I Saw the eyes of the beast of social rule and conformity. Millions of tiny eyes gazing at me, being able to look at my mess of a past and I worried if it saw my future as well. And I wondered if it saw triumph or ruin? I was a wandering ghost that haunted every social interaction, trying to find a place where my soul could rest in peace. A place where my presence wasn’t a strange phenomena that needed to be exorcized with  sage from circles of people. A toxin that didn’t poison the very air of a groups culture. But a clean breath of freshness and brought peace and relaxed the stage fright that was clear as the light that shined on everyone in the knit circle. I didn’t want to take over the play with off lines and pretend I was the star of the show. I want to share the stage and sing like the angels my co stars that ran their roles, as beautiful and gracefully as their presence. I tried many stages and ran many roles. But they sang opera while I was more jazz. And sadly, I never could sing the falsetto of personality without the strain of my voice. So I sang my song, as a wandering ghost. Trying to find a sound and a stage where I could shine. A stage where my fright is understood and taken with care. And was welcomed as the soulful one, the one who brought something to the social play, and not just noise. But intricate sound that touched the heartstrings of the group and jammed without strain.